The parents of a young British man killed in Ukraine have said the Foreign Office was “not helpful” to them, and that the families of fallen soldiers need more support.
Michaela and Christopher Tarmey told the PA news agency that their son Marlyn Tarmey had a “strong sense of justice and compassion” and “felt deeply that he had to do something” to help Ukraine.
He went out to fight in the foreign legion in March 2024 at just 19 years old and his parents stayed in close contact with him right up until the day before he was killed.
Mr Tarmey tragically lost his life aged 20 in the village of Staromaiorske in the Donetsk region of Ukraine in June 2024, just three months after joining the fighting.
His death has been “devastating” for the family, but they said they are “immensely proud of his courage and the person he was”.
Mr Tarmey’s remains have yet to be recovered, which his parents said “adds another layer of pain to our grief”.
They told PA that Mr Tarmey was “so much more than a soldier or a statistic” – he was “a much loved son, grandson, cousin, brother and friend with a big heart and a great wit”.
While the Foreign Office was not helpful, Michaela and Christopher Tarmey said the RT Weatherman Foundation, which supports families legally, communicates with the Ukrainian Army, and protects families from having to journey to a warzone, has been “a lifeline”.
The bereaved parents said they found this foundation “by chance” and want to make sure other families know about it.
They said: “In our desperation, we searched social media and reached out to people who seemed to be in Ukraine.
“Through this, someone told us about the foundation.
“Without that, we would never have known they existed and we imagine many families might never hear about them at all.”
Without this organisation, they would have been “completely on our own”, they said.
The Foreign Office has been contacted for comment.
In a statement, Michaela and Christopher Tarmey said: “Our son Marlyn was full of life, funny, kind-hearted and loved by many.
“He had an amazing sense of humour but also a strong sense of justice and compassion.
“He often said to us that Russia would not stop with Ukraine and he felt deeply that he had to do something.
“That’s why he went to volunteer, because he wanted to stand up for what he believed in, fight against the injustice and help people who were suffering.
“We stayed in close contact while he was there, right up until the day before he was killed.
“He shared with us what was happening around him and we know how determined he was to stay true to his choice.
“For us as a family, the loss has been devastating, but we remain immensely proud of his courage and the person he was.
“His remains, like those of many other fallen soldiers, have yet to be recovered, which adds another layer of pain to our grief.
“Marlyn was not alone. Many other volunteers from all over the world have risked or given their lives, and they too should not be forgotten.
“Each one had a family, a story, and a reason.
“They all deserve to be remembered with dignity.
“At the same time, families of fallen soldiers need far more support.
“The Foreign Office has not been helpful, but the RT Weatherman Foundation has been a lifeline.
“They take on the hard work of gathering evidence, supporting families legally, communicating with the Ukrainian army, and protecting families from having to make dangerous journeys into a war zone.
“Without them, we would have been completely on our own.
“If we could share one message, it’s this: Marlyn was so much more than a soldier or a statistic.
“He was a much loved son, grandson, cousin, brother and friend with a big heart and a great wit.
“We want his memory and the memory of other volunteers like him to be treated with humanity and respect.”
